Tuesday, 18 December 2012

Christmas special: THE HOLY FATHER

Ah, Christmas traditions ... the smell of chestnuts roasting on an open fire, Sir Cliff singing his cotton socks off, and jakies pissing, drunken insensate, outside the Wee Windaes pub in Ayr.

Since I moved back to the west-coast of Scotland I've been inspired to record the goings of said jakies, junkies and general street mayhem I see all around me on a daily basis. And what better time of year to deliver a verdict on 'yer fellay man' than Christmas.

In the west-coast we know you can go fuck your joys of Spring, it's the perty season that inspires. A time of random office couplings, projectile barfing and the occasional bloody nose. It's a time of lost inhibitions, lost bank cards and lost pride.

Well, you get the picture ...

THE HOLY FATHER - as it says on the tin - is a 7,000 word short story delving into the divisive nature of Scottish football, told in the raw Scots tongue, and delivered in a familiar festive setting.

And so to the blurb:


When young Scots carpenter Joe is visited by the Wing Wizard Davie Cooper one Christmas Eve he gets the shock of his life — his partner is to give birth to a king that very night. Setting off through their scheme — guided only by an unusual, yet familiar, constellation — Joe and Mary-doll soon discover their shared passion for the opposing ends of the Scottish football terraces unites them in ways they could never have imagined.
Early readers have been very generous, with US-based Scots writer Barry Graham going so far as to deliver this verdict:

‘A masterpiece. It’s like Jim Thompson and Irvine Welsh got together to write a Tony Black story.’
-Barry Graham.


How could I not be chuffed with that, eh?

So if you fancy grabbing a deek at the traditional Scots Manky Christmas, check out the links: THE HOLY FATHER(UK)     THE HOLY FATHER(USA)