Tuesday, 28 October 2014

Guest Blog: Gerard Brennan on Undercover

Gerard Brennan, author of Undercover.
By Gerard Brennan

One of the coolest things I’ve read from the early reviewers of UNDERCOVER is that if the character, Rory Cullen (a fictional footballer who has recently signed with Manchester City), actually released an autobiography, they’d read it.

Now, in fairness, I’ve put those words in a few mouths simply by including snippets from Cullen: The Autobiography at the start of each chapter in UNDERCOVER. Here’s an example:

Money is killing this game. I'd play for three square meals a day and a roof over my head if that's all it paid. Fucking love those Ferraris, though.

At some points in the novel, the quotes are meant to provide a sense of foreboding. Others are just a wee bit of fun at the expense of the more notorious (in my mind) players in the Premier League. To be clear, UNDERCOVER is a crime thriller featuring Cormac Kelly who is working undercover to infiltrate a criminal gang (yes, the clue is in the title). One of the characters just happens to be a footballer. Another character, the victim of the criminal gang, in fact, is the footballer’s agent.

I feel like that distinction should be made, lest a few people who read this post pay for a copy only to discover that it’s not a Premiership satire. There are elements of that in there, I suppose, but that’s mostly me amusing myself as I try to shape a fast-paced thriller in the form of this novel.

It got me thinking, though ... could I write a fake autobiography? And would you call it an autobiography or a biography? There may be pen name issues if I pretend to be a footballer myself. Legal ones too, as I can’t resist having a poke at the Rooneys, Beckhams and Lampards of this world, and we live in a pretty litigious society. It’d have to be an out-and-out parody for me to get away with writing the kind of stuff that other people can chat about at the pub, the gym or on their chosen social media platform. I could change the names to protect the privileged, but where’s the fun in that?

Anyway, the long and short of it is, I think I could write a Cullen biography in the style of the snippets found in UNDERCOVER. Unfortunately, I don’t think it would be easy. Possible, yes, but not easy. And here, don’t get me wrong, I like to challenge myself, but there are enough challenges already out there for me at the moment. Like trying to build a life in which I can feed my family by writing for a living. I’m kind of doing that now, though I can see a very definite finish line to this lifestyle that I’ve worked towards for over a decade. Every writer can, I suppose, (even the likes of John Grisham can fuck their career through stupidity) and all I can do is write, write, write and hope that there are enough kind souls out there willing to pay to read my scribbles.

And if you’ve read me for free – I’m looking especially at you ebook pirates – maybe you could give a little back in the form of a review? I’d forgive your ‘theft’ if you did. At least it would prove that it was worth stealing.

Unlike Rory Cullen, I’ll never buy a Ferrari, never mind a bunch of them. But that’s okay. I’m lucky to own a Hyundai (it only took me five years to pay the fecker off) and a bus timetable. So long as the kids have been dropped off or picked up from school, I’m relatively free. Could I pretend to be the new George Best for long enough each day to write his *auto*biography? Probably not. But sure, I’d like to spend a little more time with Cormac Kelly instead. I just have about 60K words to write for another couple of projects before I can. 

And I think Kelly would rather spend his time hanging out with a boxer or a mixed martial artist this time around. I know I would.


:: Visit Gerard's website: http://www.gerardbrennan.co.uk Buy Undercover on Amazon UK and Amazon USA.